steady my heart.

this song is kind of changing my life right now.

Mat Kearney - Never Be Ready

We got our feet on the wire
Talking 'bout flying
Maybe we're diving in over our heads
Scared of what I'm feeling
Staring at the ceiling
Here tonight

Come on and lay down these arms
All our best defenses
We're taking our chances here on the run
The fear is an anchor
Time is a stranger
Love isn't borrowed
We aren't promised tomorrow

We'll never be ready if we keep waiting
For the perfect time to come
Hold me steady, we'll never be ready
When we don't know, though we can't see
Just walk on down this road with me
Hold me steady, we'll never be ready

You're OK here with me
Here in the silence
With all of the violence crashing around
Saying we can't go
Saying we don't know
This road that is narrow is the one we should follow

We'll never be ready if we keep waiting
For the perfect time to come
Hold me steady, we'll never be ready
When we don't know, though we can't see
Just walk on down this road with me
Hold me steady, we'll never be ready

Steady my hands this one could turn around
Steady my heart, it's beating faster
Steady my hands this one could turn around
Steady my heart, it's beating faster
Beating faster now

We'll never be ready if we keep waiting
For the perfect time to come
Hold me steady, we'll never be ready
When we don't know, though we can't see
Just walk on down this road with me
Hold me steady, never be ready

Hold me steady, we'll never be ready
Hold me steady, we'll never be ready
Hold me steady, we'll never be ready 

fear.

I realized today that I'm not getting less scared, I'm getting more scared. Every day. Of so many things. Of being in love, and of not being loved anymore. Of not making any friends, and of losing friends that I already have. Of being happy, and of being sad. Of succeeding, and of failing. Of not having enough faith, and of not having enough realism. Of not having enough love, and of having way too much.

I just wish I had a sign to tell me that I've made the right decisions.